I made a lot of progress as an adult on understanding introversion and how much that had shaped my experience of church and family life growing up, but I feel like a thing I have really struggled with in the last several years is how much it bugs me when people don't notice things that seem really fundamental and important to me. It was really helpful to think of it in terms of introversion, that perhaps introverts are more inclined this way, and that this might give me a way of understanding some of what's going on when other people just seem oblivious to things that I cannot believe they didn't notice immediately. So, thanks, as always, for saying it!
Thank you for this episode. Susan, I understand your preparing the dinner all by yourself for your ward. I done things like that too rather than asking for help and being rebuffed.
This podcast explained why I’ve felt so uncomfortable at Church.
I arrive at meetings as they start or a little after so I avoid feeling this way.
If I have a job—something to do—it makes a difference. But volunteering to help doesn’t always work because the same people are always chosen to help They know each other and I feel left out.
I feel so much better about being outside the inner circle.
I relate to this episode so much! I am very much an introvert and had some serious social anxiety as a teenager. Looking back I can see how I was constantly put outside my comfort zone while being involved in the church. Some experiences were good for me and I appreciate the social and organizations skills I learned being involved in leadership, event planning, and public speaking. However everything fell apart when I served a full time mission. In this episode you didn’t mention the LDS mission culture, but I thought about how much everything you talked about applied to it. I got terrible anxiety talking to strangers and that was one of the metrics that was constantly talked about and pushed on us to achieve in the mission field. Every week we had to make goals for how many contacts we would make through street contracting, cold calls, or tracting. I remember the daily anxiety, pressure, guilt, and shame I felt because I knew I was failing as a missionary because I couldn’t hit the numbers our mission president wanted us to. There was even a general authority who made my companion cry because he told us we weren’t talking to enough people. The thing is I loved making connections with members and finding ways to do service in the community, but these activities were to be limited or looked down on. There was no wiggle room in what made you a good missionary. I just wanted to be a follower of Christ and love the people around me, but my specific personality and talents were discouraged and shamed. This experience kicked off more than a decade of depression and disconnect from my personal spirituality.
I made a lot of progress as an adult on understanding introversion and how much that had shaped my experience of church and family life growing up, but I feel like a thing I have really struggled with in the last several years is how much it bugs me when people don't notice things that seem really fundamental and important to me. It was really helpful to think of it in terms of introversion, that perhaps introverts are more inclined this way, and that this might give me a way of understanding some of what's going on when other people just seem oblivious to things that I cannot believe they didn't notice immediately. So, thanks, as always, for saying it!
Thank you for this episode. Susan, I understand your preparing the dinner all by yourself for your ward. I done things like that too rather than asking for help and being rebuffed.
This podcast explained why I’ve felt so uncomfortable at Church.
I arrive at meetings as they start or a little after so I avoid feeling this way.
If I have a job—something to do—it makes a difference. But volunteering to help doesn’t always work because the same people are always chosen to help They know each other and I feel left out.
I feel so much better about being outside the inner circle.
Thank you.
I relate to this episode so much! I am very much an introvert and had some serious social anxiety as a teenager. Looking back I can see how I was constantly put outside my comfort zone while being involved in the church. Some experiences were good for me and I appreciate the social and organizations skills I learned being involved in leadership, event planning, and public speaking. However everything fell apart when I served a full time mission. In this episode you didn’t mention the LDS mission culture, but I thought about how much everything you talked about applied to it. I got terrible anxiety talking to strangers and that was one of the metrics that was constantly talked about and pushed on us to achieve in the mission field. Every week we had to make goals for how many contacts we would make through street contracting, cold calls, or tracting. I remember the daily anxiety, pressure, guilt, and shame I felt because I knew I was failing as a missionary because I couldn’t hit the numbers our mission president wanted us to. There was even a general authority who made my companion cry because he told us we weren’t talking to enough people. The thing is I loved making connections with members and finding ways to do service in the community, but these activities were to be limited or looked down on. There was no wiggle room in what made you a good missionary. I just wanted to be a follower of Christ and love the people around me, but my specific personality and talents were discouraged and shamed. This experience kicked off more than a decade of depression and disconnect from my personal spirituality.