Welcome to the ALSSI Newsletter!
Kick-off Edition, June 2021
Hello, Friends —
I've always had walking and running partners. I remember late night runs with a high school friend, sharing endless gossip and advice about love as we circled a neighborhood track under the stars. Chatty afternoon walks with a neighbor, pushing babies in strollers while we complained about callings or discussed what we were cooking for dinner. Hundreds of miles run with a friend as we trained for races together, but also for life—breathlessly pounding out shared fears about kids, jobs, marriage, or money. Now, even if I'm walking alone, I'm often chatting on Marco Polo with a distant friend.
When Cynthia and I started At Last She Said It, we knew we probably weren't alone in our thoughts, feelings, or experiences, even if no one seemed to be having the conversations we wanted to have about them. We believed it because there were so many times chatting with each other when one of us would share something, and the other would say, "Oh, thank you for saying that out loud! Me too!"
We felt it couldn't just be the two of us who were longing for space to talk with other women about the hard stuff in our personal lives that tangled knots in our faith lives. Because everyone we knew had lives and families that were messy and complicated, just like ours.
We wouldn't be the only two Latter-day Saint women dying to unpack burdens we'd been struggling under the weight of for years with nowhere to set them down—church stories and experiences more painful than faith-promoting.
Or be alone in feeling the lack of space to safely express our hope for change, or our impatience while we wait for it to come.
Turns out we were right—as soon as we started saying it, you all showed up to say, "Thank you for saying that out loud!" And, "Me too."
You're exactly the community we needed, believed was possible, and hoped we could find through this project. For me, somehow everything seems easier if we all walk together, and talk along the way.
So thanks for being part of the ALSSI community, and subscribing to our newsletter. Our goal is to have a place to share some of our social media content with listeners who might not see it, and make additional content (like episode transcripts!) available too. Eventually we’ll add a chat feature where we can host discussions in a little more private forum than Fb or Insta provide. Now let's all say it, and say it again. Let's keep saying it until we've each finally said whatever we need to say.
— Susan
Did you catch Episode 47, For the Men in the Room?
In this episode, we shared thoughts to help facilitate conversations between men and women about some of the challenges presented—for both—by the patriarchal structure of the Church and its impact on our culture and on women’s church experiences.
Listeners responded:
“I just finished listening to your latest episode where Cynthia mentioned that you created a Pink and Silver banquet to honor the Activity Day girls. I just HAVE to share my story. I was in a primary presidency, when we decided to do this same thing. Since we have a small ward, we just combined with the Cubs and had a blue, gold, and pink dinner. The evening was a HUGE success with one of the highest ward turnouts ever. It was a beautiful thing to see every child who was between 8-12 celebrated. In fact, the evening was so successful, that this marvelous primary president invited the girls to participate in the Pinewood Derby. This was also a monumental success and many dads shared how much fun they had doing this with their girls. We did this for two years and everyone really loved it.” —S.B., via email
“We had stake conference last weekend and almost every speaker (with the exception of the stake presidency and mission or temple president) was a woman at both the general session and at the adult session. […] We even had a female speaker at stake priesthood meeting a few months ago. I thanked our SP for having so many women speak and [said] that I notice. He said, “Thanks. It’s on purpose.” It’s so nice to see a leader purposefully amplifying women’s voices when it feels so rare on a bigger scale like at general conference. And I second Neylan McBaine’s book. It has such wonderful ideas for thinking outside the box.” —specharich, via Instagram
“I love when I get to assign episodes to my husband.” — epratt24, via Instagram
“Powerful example if men would listen to 8 hours of all women speakers twice a year.” —C.G., via Facebook
“Responding to the comments about women being more spiritual than men. I agree that the comparison is useless, in the sense that men and women bring different things to the table and one approach is not necessarily better than the other. I believe some of the masculine and feminine approaches to spirituality are generalizable, others that are not. If you look at archetypal attributes, we see sets of strengths that center around different ways of knowing. Achievement, linear and intellectual approaches (think the Enlightenment) are largely associated with the masculine. The bodily, intuitive, sensorial expressions are largely associated with the feminine, and are largely mocked and ignored, and treated as inferior in patriarchy. I think this is what is meant in the idea that women are more spiritual…their affinity for community and integration connects and heals. They also bring more understanding of the importance of integrating ways of knowing. Bringing all these different ways of knowing to spirituality and discipleship would change the whole dynamic of family, community, and church.
I personally don’t think it was God’s (m+f) plan to call only men to positions of authority and priesthood power (priesthood power knows no gender) in the church. I believe that’s the way it has evolved (humans making choices) and God is not interfering in the agency of those in positions of privilege. I understand, from my studies, that Adam-and-Eve (before they were divided in the Garden of Eden) was the high priest. This is the true pattern of power and godliness. Until we can individually move toward the harmony of that union, we will see through a glass, darkly.” — K.K.S., via ALSSI website
To find a transcript of Episode 47, click here.
“Ours is not a gospel of limitation;
it is a gospel of empowerment.”
—Neylan McBaine
Social media is great, BUT—
It’s visible to everyone. Sometimes our podcast topics bring up things for women that they’d like to share, but a comment on Facebook or Instagram just doesn’t seem like the right place. Emailing us is good, but not if you want input or ideas from a variety of women.
This is why we started our Ladies’ Night In discussion groups. Although we’re not holding them monthly now, we will continue to host them, so watch this space for announcements of upcoming dates!
If it grows, our newsletter may become another way listeners can connect with other community members, and also lend financial support to the podcast. Although it’s not available yet, paid subscribers would have access to special ALSSI Community Chats. Not as private as a pm, but not public like leaving a comment on social media. Hopefully, it would be just the right place for a deeper conversational dive to process it all with a community of caring women. Access to transcripts of all episodes would be another benefit.
Meanwhile, anyone can subscribe to the free newsletter—and it will always be free.
Listeners who have already donated to the podcast via our website—you know who you are! Thank you!— would automatically receive a complimentary paid subscription.
You may be asking…where do those donation dollars go?
We’re humbled every day at the kindness and generosity of our listeners. Whether it’s through comments, feedback, showing up to support other women in a discussion group, giving us your precious ear-time, or sending financial support, we feel real gratitude for the ways you contribute to this community.
You may wonder why we accept donations. There are monthly costs associated with producing a podcast and maintaining a site. Quite simply, a donation to ALSSI helps us pay those bills.
Most people probably don’t go into podcasting to get rich—if they do, they’ll likely be disappointed. Preparing content, booking guests, recording and editing a show, maintaining a website, running social media, and interacting with listeners all take time. As much time as a job, actually! As women we do a lot of unpaid work in our lives—just like you—and we’ve been happy to do this unpaid work too. But if there’s a little left over after the bills are paid, it’ll become a modest stipend that reminds us you value our work as much as we value this community, and your support of it.
And finally…
If you’ve hung around the podcast much, you may have noticed we both like cake. (Really, really like it.) So it makes sense that an ALSSI Newsletter would include a cake recipe!
Cynthia’s Starbucks Knock-off Lemon Pound Cake
(Whenever I meet friends at Starbucks I always get the lemon cake since I don’t drink coffee. I decided to develop my own recipe since I love it so much. —C.)
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1 cup sugar (214g)
Zest of one large lemon
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 cup vegetable oil (97g)
2 large eggs
1 teaspoon vanilla
1 teaspoon lemon powder (optional, I buy this from King Arthur Flour)
1/2 cup buttermilk
A few drops of yellow food coloring (optional)
1 1/2 cups (190 g) cake flour or all purpose flour (if at high altitude use an extra 2 tablespoons or 216g total)
1 teaspoon baking powder
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Glaze:
1 cup powdered sugar
1/4 teaspoon lemon powder (opt.)
Approx 1 tablespoon lemon juice
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Rub lemon zest into the sugar until fragrant and sugar is light yellow. Add eggs, oil, salt, vanilla,buttermilk, food coloring and lemon powder and whisk well.
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Whisk in flour and baking powder until well combined but don’t overstir. Pour into a greased 8x4 loaf pan. Bake at 350 for 45-50 minutes until toothpick inserted comes out with barely a few crumbs attached. Let cool in pan for 10 minutes then remove and cool on rack. Glaze once cool.
“I don't think any day is worth living without thinking
about what you're going to eat next all the time.”
— Nora Ephron
We hope you’ll join us!
When we talk about it, we’re all a bit less alone. Thanks for listening, for discussing, for sharing, and for walking with us…wherever you do.
— Cynthia & Susan
PS. We hope you’ll share this with anyone who might enjoy it. And if you haven’t already, please subscribe!