“My faith life really begins with death,” explains Pam Heggie. “Meaning, the real, genuine experiences of my life that molded me, shaped me and taught me what love and empathy really are, began with deaths. Four (so far) to be exact. Five if you count my own.” In Episode 191, Pam joins Susan and Cynthia to discuss lessons she’s learned at the intersection of grief and faith. In what ways might being a member of our church make grieving easier…or harder? Her experiences are packed with insights that can help all of us in our desire to mourn with and bring comfort to each other in times of grief.
Notes & Quotes:
Grieving and Growing, ALSSI Podcast Ep. 23
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma, by Bessel van der Kolk
“…..by far the most growth has come from healing from grief. Hands down, my grief is what has fueled [other life lessons]. As I have looked around my surroundings more, and noticed all the suffering that only used to be in my blindspots, I realize there’s a price to pay for such wisdom. I once said to my therapist, “I paid a terrible price to learn these lessons.”
Ecclesiastes 1:18 says “For in much wisdom is much grief; and she that increaseth knowledge increaseth sorrow.”
“….Working through my own grief opened up the grief of others to me as well. Grieving …. meant I carried an extra weight, an extra burden. Extra sorrow as Ecclesiastes says. Jesus carried the weight of the world so if we are to be like him, how can we not be expected to carry just a smidgeon of that sorrow and grief? And in a weird kind of paradox, when we learn to really love and suffer with others we definitely get something in return. As Victor Hugo says in Les Miserables, “to love another person is to see the face of God.” In Mormon speak, we might call that sanctification.” — Cynthia Winward
